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Accepting Hurt And Seeing
The Person As A Teacher—Cultivate Forgiveness
When someone I have
And in whom I
have placed great trust
Hurts me very
I will practice
seeing that person as my supreme teacher.
This speaks about somebody we have benefited, who has been our best friend,
whom we’ve trusted and told our secrets to. Then this person turns around
and does exactly what we don’t want them to do. We feel vulnerable and hurt.
When we are hurt, it’s often because we’ve held unrealistic expectations of
others. Think of a situation in which you felt hurt. Did you have accurate
expectations? How did they cause you to feel betrayed, disappointed or
When we are hurt, it’s because our buttons have been pushed. Our buttons are
our responsibility—as long as we have them, they will get pushed. That
person becomes a great teacher by pointing our clearly what we need to work
on, thus giving us the chance to resolve areas of internal conflict.
When people we’ve trusted steal our stuff, criticize us, break off the
relationship, talk behind our back, stop loving us, or give us bad
recommendations, we need to see them as our supreme teacher. What are they
teaching us? Compassion. Abandoning expectations. Letting go of clinging to
a solid image of somebody else. Patience that gives other people space to
make mistakes. They are people just like we are.
We may still take actions to
resolve a problem area—but from a space of understanding and calmness.