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Mental Nutrients: What To Say When You Talk To Your Self

If you continue to think what you've always thought,

you'll continue to get what you've always got!

Our mind is the garden, the thoughts are the seeds, the harvest will be either flowers or weeds.

Inevitably so, inevitably so! Mel Veldon.

The quality of our thoughts influence the quality of our lives. Our minds can make us sick OR we can use our minds to improve our health.

If you have found that your mental habits and life experiences have led to your feeling discouraged, disconnected, and drooped--believe it or not--those patterns of thoughts and emotional reactions CAN be changed!

You can open yourself up to positive and powerful habits of thought and more balanced emotional reactions. You can learn to celebrate yourself and life!

When my mind gets into fear, disappointment, feeling alone and unloved...I acknowledge it, and then I take time to consider different kinds of thoughts and images. Since at least at one level, I'm creating my "feeling tone" of my experience by my interpretation of it.

I had to learn about my thinking habits, to accept the fact that "what I think becomes me.”  Whatever I put my focus on...EXPANDS: fears or trust, misery or happiness and joy. When I constantly think discouraging thoughts about myself and others, I end up feeling very discouraged about everything. I tried it. It works! But when I put encouraging, loving thoughts into my mind about others and myself, I have a great time! I tried it. It works! The choice is yours—and mine.

A healthy body is built by practicing sound nutrition choices and living an active lifestyle.

 A HEALTHY MIND is developed through developing effective MENTAL HABITS.

Plant the Mental Garden of Your Life With Seeds of Well-Being!

Delight In Exploring!

Imagine Your Ideal Day, consider Harmony, Abundance, Equality, and Commitment

 How to Develop a Loving, Self-Nurturing, Inner Voice For You!

Nourishing Affirmations, Seeing your uniqueness, Creating a vision for your new life,

Letting go of all your old self-destructive or restrictive personal identities,

GIVING YOURSELF all of the love you want from others,

and Stretching yourself towards new dimensions of well-being!

Be Happy and Contented! and Various Meditations

Peace! and Kiss The Earth and Walk as You Touch Peace in Every Moment!


Happiness Project Toolbox

The Happiness Project Toolbox supplies eight tools to help you construct your "happiness project." Everyone's project will be different, and there's no right or wrong way. You can use all eight tools, or you can pick one tool that appeals to you. Just jump in and start now.


Daily Strength Website: Discover many Popular Support Groups. Also find health blogs, expert treatments, and other ways to be empowered.


Zen Habits: Zen Habits is about finding simplicity in the daily chaos of our lives. It’s about clearing the clutter so we can focus on what’s important, create something amazing, find happiness. and About Zen Habits:

Along your journey of change, be gentle with yourself!

Be respectful towards yourself:

"Don’t shout at the apple and demand that it ripen!

It won’t ripen any faster and all you’ll get is a sore throat!!!"

—Advice given to me by my counselor

Affirmations: Suggestions & Methods for their use

See Bob's story Mental Skills -- whatever you FOCUS ON, expands!

Also check out Bob's story The Emotional area.

Visit Home Coming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child.

Explore  When Helping You Is Hurting Me.

Discover Re-evaluation Counseling.

Consider the Dieting Versus Non-Dieting Approaches.

Contemplate the Out of hell, into freedom thoughts and lastly,

Transform your thinking, visit Make your mind an ocean and Meditations

SIMS: Seattle Insight Meditation Society (Rodney Smith):

Some Other Helpful Resources

 Celebrate Healthy Mental States, Self-Nurturing, Self- Esteem, and Healthy Relationships

From Library Journal
The authors, both cognitive psychotherapists, identify 11 common "lifetraps," which they define as repetitive, destructive behavior patterns associated with a negative self-image. Using illustrations from case studies, the authors describe each lifetrap, discuss its origins in childhood experience, and provide a questionnaire for self-assessment.
They then offer a program for change using techniques ranging from experiential (getting in touch with your inner child) to cognitive (writing a "case" against your lifetrap) and behavioral (identifying specific behaviors to be changed). - Lucille Boone, San Jose P.L., Cal. Available at:

  •       Self-Esteem, by Matthew McKay, PH.D. & Patrick Fanning, (2000), New Harbinger Publications, Inc. This books offers numerous suggestions for disarming the inner critic, transforming cognitive distortions as you develop a compassionate mind, and exploring your core unconscious beliefs so you can understand how they effect your life and transform them.

  • Healing from Depression: 12 Weeks to a Better Mood, by Douglas Bloch, M.A., (2002), Celestial Arts Publishers, See For A Five-Part Holistic Self-Care Program, by Douglas Bloch for a description of book.

  • Hugs! * Hugs! * Hugs! * Hugs are fat-free, sugar-free, and require no batteries. Hugs reduce blood pressure, body temperature, and relieve pain and depression. Hugs brighten the day and lighten the heart! Discover Free HUG coupons at:

  • The Only Diet There Is, Sondra Ray explains in her book, that if we forgive the past, drop negative thoughts and resentments, stop being victims—we drop our fat as well. She asserts that as we release our negativity, we release excess weight in our minds, hearts, and in our bodies. I used this book extensively and found all of the exercises and affirmations to be quite helpful. Copyright date is 1981 by Celestial Arts Publishers. You'll find it at

  • Living Juicy-Daily Morsels For Your Creative Soul, & The Bodacious Book of Succulence by SARK (1994), Celestial Arts, Berkeley, California. For a catalog, call:  (800) 841-BOOK. These books (and SARK'S Web site) are SO MUCH FUN and are delightfully colorful! at Plantet SARK!

  • Celebrate Your Self - Making Life Work For You (Your Child's Self Esteem), by Dorothy Corkille Briggs, (1986), Main Street Books. I found this book to be really helpful. I read both of these books extensively. They were wonderful. They helped me understand why I hated myself and how I could begin to change. They are also available used for very reasonable prices.

  • What To Say When You Talk To Your Self, by Shad Helmstetter, (1990), Pocket Books. This book in very practical and understandable terms helps unravel the mystery of how self-talk creates our inner conditioning which creates our success or our failures. Check it out! Available used.

  • The Joyful Child: A Sourcebook of Activities and Ideas for Releasing Children's Natural Joy By Peggy Jenkins, Ph.D., Aslan Publishing, ©1996

    This book is not just for the children in your life. It is also for you! As you learn to guide your children's discovery of joy your awareness will expand and you will grow more in touch with your own inner joy. is both a source and a resource book. Between its covers is a wealth of ideas and activities. In addition it is liberally sprinkled with quotations and references to lead you to a wide variety of excellent resources

  • Learning To Love Your Self, by Gay Hendricks, (1982), Prentice Hall Press, New York

  • You Can Be Happy No Matter What: Five Principles for Keeping Life in Perspective, by Richard Carlson, Ph.D., (1997), New World Library. Richard shares PRINCIPLES ABOUT: of thoughts, about moods, of separate realities, of feelings, and of the present moment. He helps the reader create more effective relationships, understand stress, and solve problems in life to increase happiness and reduce addictive behaviors. Provides a "checklist for your life."

  • The Feeling Good Handbook, by David Burns, M.D., (1999), a Plume Book. David shows you how to overcome depression, conquer anxiety, and enjoy greater intimacy. Provides methods to diagnose your moods and understand them, and apply 4 steps to happiness. Includes a comprehensive discussion of mood-altering medications.

  • Readers can review 25 mental health conditions and determine the best course for treatment. Examples: anger, phobias, depression, anxiety, burnout, co-dependency, eating disorders, passive/aggressive behaviors, marital/relationship problems, gambling, grief/bereavement, parenting issues, self-esteem, sexual concerns, sleep problems, stress, and many other topics are covered. Suggestions are given about when to seek emergency care, when to see a physician, when to go to a counselor, and when self-help is appropriate. 7 3/8" x 9". 96 pages COST: $5.95. Item #: 2147.  Go to the "products/online store--> Self-Care Guides"

  • Home Coming-Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child, by John Bradshaw, (1992), Bantam Books. Excellent, practical, helpful book on learning to embrace your inner emotional self.

  • The Relaxation & Stress Reduction Workbook, by Martha Davis and Mathew McKay, (2002), New Harbinger Publication, Inc.

  • Best comprehensive site on the Internet. Includes: helpful introduction, comprehensive disorder explanation, diagnosis and treatment, diagnose yourself segment, quality of life assessment, extensive medication description, magazine and books sections, research findings, Internet links, and help.

  •  Gives the medical basis of stress, depression, anxiety, sleep problems, and drug use—explained in a fun, easy-to-read format.

  • Interactive depression self-help site. From Kaiser Permanente Center for Health Research. Includes a one-time registration. Practical suggestions.

  • provides comprehensive explanation of what depression is, the symptoms, types, causes, and treatments. After personal evaluation, your doctor may prescribe medications to help stabilize your thinking processes. Many individuals don't require drug therapy, but it can be essential for some people. I recommend evaluating your lifestyle choices and making gradual changes that fit you and feel good, as an essential component for life-long mental well-being. Inclusion here does not constitute endorsement of this site, or of any other products or services contained therein. See How To Use This Site for ideas on how to begin.

  • Self Parenting-The Complete Guide To Your Inner Conversations, by Dr. John K. Pollard, III, (1987), Generic Human Studies Publishing This book includes lots of fun pictures and explores terrific journaling techniques to explore connecting with your inner emotional self and changing the "feeling tone" of your relationship with yourself.

  • Women’s Comfort Book, by Jennifer Louden, (1992), Harper-Collins, NY This book is terrific! It includes HUNDREDS OF practical suggestions on how to begin caring for yourself. It includes a thorough section on "self-care at a glance."

  • You Can Heal Your Life, by Louise L. Hay, (1984), Hay House, Santa Monica, CA

  •       At each stage of our life, we learn a predictable series of skills. If development is impeded at a particular point, an important skill may not be learned affecting the next stage. The first four to six years of life are when we are most dependent, receptive, and malleable—and they have a profound effect on the rest of our lives. For me, being wounded at many of the stages affected all of my relationships—with myself and other people. I learned about these concepts in Keeping The Love You Find, by Harville Hendrix, (1992, Pocket Books). The book explains with amazing clarity how our initial relationships form an imago, a buried potential image, and consequently create an unconscious attraction to fall in love with someone who has the positive and negative traits of our imperfect parents. This is someone who we feel will meet our emotional needs—except that they can’t. Provides terrific exploratory exercises to understand and transform present unhealthy patterns into a journey towards a conscious partnership. There are therapists who are trained in IMAGO therapy. It is an excellent book!

  •       Life101 Peter Mc Williams sells his books at . I found Peter's books to be humorous, insightful, and FUN to read. Some titles: Life 101, Love 101, Do It!, You Can't Afford The Luxury of a Negative Thought, and many others.