Home Plant Seeds of Vitality! Ecosystem Vitality! Change? How? 12 Essential Skills Daily Tune-Up! Bobs Story Various Resources Delicious Quick Meals 12 Step Programs Meditations Services

search engine by freefind



If we're not careful,

We will wind up where we are headed. --Chinese Proverb

Your moment-by-moment choices up until now have shaped your present life. What You Plant Is What You Get.pdf

                                                         Change? Who, Me? How?

                                                          If You Continue To Do 
                                                  What You’ve Always Done,
                                                  You’ll Continue To Get
                                                 What You’ve Always Gotten!

How is your life going? Is it going well? Do you feel overwhelmed and confused?

Are your behaviors around food out of control?
Are you fairly miserable? Do you feel helpless and hopeless?
If you are uncomfortable, this could lead you to consider making changes. Pay a visit to Bob's Story (physical activity example) and look below for an explanation of the Stages Of Change Model which describes the process of making changes.

However you feel, just start where you are! You can't be anywhere else.

Ecosystem Weight Management is a process…of AWARENESS, SELF-HONORING,
ACTION, and SUPPORT...that encourages gradual change.

You may find that your life at present is touched by many challenging circumstances that make losing weight seem impossible. You might feel helpless and hopeless about changing. Is this how you are feeling? I have felt that same way before. Things CAN change for the better.

Consider exploring the Do You Experience Overwhelming Circumstances? link to provide perspective and to get encouragement for yourself.

Achieving a healthier weight for a lifetime requires lifestyle adjustment and lots of practice!

If you keep on with The SAME commitments,
THE SAME relationships,
THE SAME thought patterns,
THE SAME food plan,
THE SAME ways of nurturing yourself,

Well, guess what? You’ll get the same...RESULTS!

The key is to simplify your life…to S...L...O...W...IT DOWN!
Look into your life and ask yourself:

In WHAT ways is your life working well? Pay attention. Acknowledge yourself!

HOW is it not working well? Where do your daily choices lead you? Towards well-being? Towards disease?
HOW do you do you do this to yourself? Consider paying attention. Be tender with yourself.

Observe yourself with gentleness, honesty and self-respect.

WHAT is it that YOU DO (or don’t do) to create the out-of-control patterns?

When things go well, WHAT ARE YOU DOING (or not doing) to support this?

HOW can you transform your daily choices to bring you lasting health? See Bob’s story and other sections of this Web site.

Cultivate what is wholesome. Abandon what is harmful. Over time, unwholesome patterns get weaker and the new, wholesome patterns take their place and become stronger.

We find our way one step at a time.

How do you begin? Where do you begin? Right where you are.
You can’t be anywhere else. So, start there.

Seize the Moment!

See your unborn wholeness and trust for it to emerge. Visit the Essential Skills section #9 for Self-Nurturing ideas.

Remember: Progress, not perfection!
Developing new patterns is an unfolding process...it blossoms...gradually…
One day at a time!
Are you ready for the adventure? Let’s begin!

Small enjoyable changes, consistently practiced, lead to sought-after results!

The steps that you select should be FUN and enjoyable! Self-care does not have to be torture. You can learn to celebrate a healthful lifestyle! In fact, making FUN your focus will insure that your new patterns naturally become your new way you create your life. Pay a visit to Small Baby Steps Lead to Success!

The thinking that caused the problem cannot be the thinking that solves it. --Albert Einstein

Problems cannot be solved at the same level of awareness that created them.

Choose to THINK and DO something different!


It's All About You....



Make healthy choices that fit your lifestyle so you can do the things you want to do.
Be realistic: make small changes over time in what you eat and the level of activity you do.
BE ADVENTUROUS: Expand your tastes to enjoy a variety of foods.
BE FLEXIBLE: Balance what you eat and the physical activity you do over several days. No need to worry about just one meal or one day.
BE SENSIBLE: Enjoy all foods, just don’t overdo it.
BE ACTIVE: Walk the dog, don’t just watch the dog walk!


  • REFRAME SETBACKS: The difference between perfectionism and excellence is that PERFECTIONISM forbids mistakes; EXCELLENCE learns from mistakes and makes corrections! Perseverance is the most important.

  • Notice what you are doing right (which is probably most things). Celebrate your successes--no matter how small they seem to be.

  • Emphasize patience. We are just learning a new behavior or skill. Celebrate the failure of not meeting your goals. We learn more from “setbacks” than success!

  • Invent NEW MISTAKES! Don’t fear them.

  • Humans are a part of nature. We change in the same way—back and forth-between old and new—towards a new experience.

Engender a sense of tolerance.

There are many paths to well-being.

Use what works. Release what doesn't.

  The Stages of Change:

No one stage is more important than another—it’s a PROCESS of change.


* Taken from the CDC Physical Activity is for Everyone: http://www.cdc.gov/nccdphp/dnpa/physical/starting/


                                                     The Stages of Change:

                           No one stage is more important than another—it’s a process.   

Stage of Change

Ways to Motivate Change

Pre-contemplation—Not even thinking about changing. Not ready yet!

Increase awareness of the effects of the problem behavior. HOW are your present choices harmful to you or others? Take responsibility.

Contemplation—Beginning to think about risks and benefits of change.

Contemplate & Prioritize!


Many people experience a "triggering event": illness, mental or emotional distress. The goal is to decrease uncertainty about wanting to make changes by identifying pros (benefits to you) and cons (hassles) of change. Are the long-term benefits worth the short-term costs?  What Does It Look Like When Things Are Going Well? These times can be filled with guilt, shame, hopelessness, and desperation. See ideas below on how to sort things out. Get support for yourself.

Preparation—Plan for a change, but you don’t know what to do. You begin to think of ways to change.

Plan & Prepare—gather tools for yourself!

Evaluate your life, get advice and help. Seek information: perhaps make phone calls, attend meetings or seminars. You're in the process of gathering tools for yourself. Listen to your "self-talk" about the value to you of making changes. Make an action plan with specific steps.  Set a date. Identify rewards.

Action—Making changes. Committing time and energy to practice new behaviors.

Action = Practice!

Start small. Set specific, achievable, meaningful, short-term goals. Work to solve problems as they arise. Action is PRACTICE. New behaviors will feel uncomfortable to you at first, and you won't be very skilled at them. You'll make mistakes. New habits are the most "fragile" to revert back to OLD habits during the first 6 months.

RelapseReturning to former patterns. It will happen. Choose to learn from it. Can last five minutes or five years!


Apply Positive & Powerful Problem Solving! Learn to cope.


RELAPSE IS NOT FAILURE. IT IS LEARNING. It can happen at ANY stage, especially between pre-contemplation and contemplation, and during times of crisis. Be kind with yourself and honest. NOTICE what has happened.  Determine what you can learn from the experience, and plan ahead for the future. Problem solve: use your knowledge as a tool for your next stage. Keep a journal to notice and unravel patterns. Plan behavior substitutions. Don’t give up. Don't give up. Just begin again! Seek out helpful resources on this web site.

Maintenance—Continuing new behaviors with increased confidence. Have awareness of what triggers a relapse and make plans to avoid it.

Persist with Patience and have FUN!

Remind yourself of reasons for having changed--never forget WHY you wanted to do something different. See Bob's story, Emotional Area for examples of reasons. Reevaluate and redefine your tools and your plan. It will get easier to maintain new behaviors over time.  Be patient and persistent.  Change is a process, NOT an event. Practice self and stress-management skills. Notice if you have fallen back into a chronic, unhealthy patterns again and use the self-evaluation tools (use the Daily Personal Check-In section of this Website). Congratulate yourself for having the courage to do it!

For a PDF printable file: The Stages of Change-WEBSITE 2.pdf

Are you "sick and tired of being sick and tired?"

Create an inspiring reason for your commitment! Perhaps get a notebook and write down the answers to these questions:

  1. How would you define success for yourself? What do you want to do or change in your life? How would it benefit you (or others) to do it?

  2. List some advantages and disadvantages of keeping things the way they are or doing things differently:

    ASK Yourself:

    • What are advantages of the way things are now?    What are disadvantages of things right now?

    • What are the difficulties of doing things differently? What would be the benefits of doing other things?

    I encourage you to take the time to write down the answers to these questions and consider them for yourself.

    After you go through this "sorting out" process, you will have convinced yourself of the value TO YOU of choosing to make an investment in yourself to change your life.

To USE the stages of change process to help you make changes, explore:

A Daily Reminder

Change your moment-by-moment choices, change your life!

Pay attention! Live in AWARENESS, not just on autopilot.

Notice your PATTERNS. WHO is going to live your life?

YOU or your patterns?

See Reasons We Eat: Healthful and Harmful section.

Some daily reminders for making an effort—by reflecting, reading, studying, trying new things out each week. So in effect, set your motivation—your reason for making the effort.

For most people the process of making lasting lifestyle changes takes 1 - 3 years.

 Be an explorer… Have fun!

  • Think about why you are making an investment in yourself.

  • Are you perhaps sick and tired of feeling sick and tired?

  • Are you ready to quit fad dieting and ready to make a long-term investment, a commitment—in you?

  • Do it—because you deeply care about you.

  • Do it—because you want your life to be healthy at all levels: in body, mind, and spirit.

  • I make a commitment to be open to learning!

  • I make a commitment to be aware of my choices and their consequences!

  •  I make a commitment to be kind to myself!

  •  I make a commitment to a new way of living!

  • I make a commitment to celebrate life-long learning!


                      May I trust my limitless ability to grow and may I respect the progress I’ve already made.

 Become who I truly want to become. Trust that I can do it!

I love who I am and I love who I am becoming.


Unlock your potential!

Say YES to your wild & precious life!


You have within you

All the answers to the challenges you face.

Become your own personal lifestyle trainer

Or in effect, be a gardener to your own mind and life.

Have a deep confidence in your ability to heal suffering

and a deep belief in your magnificent potential.

Tune within for your answers.

As you practice this skill, over time,

You discover your profound wisdom.


   You become healthier from the inside out.     



Making a Change for Good: A Guide to Compassionate Self-Discipline

Making a Change for Good: A Guide to Compassionate Self-Discipline (Paperback) by Cheri Huber (Author)

This is a wonderful book. Please visit Cheri's own website for access to her many other wonderful books: http://www.cherihuber.com/



Additional Resources for Self-Change

·         Changing for Good: A Six-Stage Program for Overcoming Bad Habits and Moving Your Life Positively Forward by James Prochaska, John Norcross, Carlo Diclemente. (1994). Avon Books.

·         The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, by Stephen R. Covey. (1989). Simon & Schuster and First Things First by Stephen R. Covey and A. Roger Merrill. (1994). A Fireside Book. Both are classics!

Return to Top

             Copyright © 2001-2018 Bob Wilson BS, DTR  All Right Reserved. Articles are for personal use only. Please request permission for other uses. Thanks!